This has been something I have been thinking about a lot lately. So sorry, you don't get kid picts today. Instead you get me venting. Maybe it is that I am a little high on meds because I have another kidney stone or I am extra sensitive these days. I don't know but good luck understanding this post. There have been some things going on with people that I am very close to. I know these things happen all the time and that crap just seems to happens. Unfortunately, just living right and being good people doesn't make us exempt. All sorts of variations and different situations of crap. Some of which are things we could have prevented, and some that we have zero control over. What it leaves me thinking is life here is short and we never know what will happen and how long we get to be here on earth. What I do know is those who leave us get to go on with their family members who have passed on before and can be happy. What I hate more than anything is regret. It makes me think of how my relationships are. How have I made those lives around me any better? Do they know that I love them? Especially those in my family. I love my family. I know my kids and husband know I love them. But I don't know if my brothers and sisters know how much I think of them and worry about them. I am not near as close as I would like to be. My excuses have always been that we have our own lives and everyone just gets busy. But what it comes down to, is that if one of them were to leave this earth today how much I would regret not trying harder to build our relationships. I can't say that I have made their lives better and that is all on me. So going against all my "Sawyer ways" (for those of you who don't know...."it is the bottle it up and bury it down deep" way), I am going to try harder. For those of you who check my blog, I love you and I pray for you all the time. I hope you are all happy and expect lots of phone calls and emails and other ways I can bug you because I want to get to know you all better.
ps percocets are great for pain but they give me some crazy dreams. Anyway sorry for the midnight venting.
11 comments:
thanks sister...your the best.
sorry to hear about your kidney stone. And yeah, percoset does crazy stuff. I took that after my Csection and it was weird.
I loved your blog..it reminded me that I need to be better at keeping up my relationships with my family too (my brothers, etc). You're right, we do use the excuse that we have our own lives now, but it doesn't mean that you can't have close family relationships anymore.
Oh! By the way - thank you so much for your comment on my most recent blog post. I think that was the longest blog comment I've ever gotten from you, so it must have hit home with you LOL. I appreciate what you said in your "p.s." you are so wonderful too! I wish sometimes that could have the knowledge and hindsight we have now but 10 years ago. hahah. Would't that be great. Anyway you are fantastic Becky!
oh my gosh, I'm so sorry you have a kidney stone - I didn't even know you had one - so not fun. You are the sweetest.
You never have to apologize for venting. It's YOUR blog! (: You know all my posts are so random!
I am kind of like you. I (obviously) live really far away from my family. But I have unlimited calls to the states and I hardly ever use my minutes. My two sister I keep in contact with, but my brothers...not as much. Thanks for the reminder,and I hope it goes well for you!
You are the best!!
I appreciated your post. I know you were talking mostly about family but I want you to know that my life is better because you are in it!! Thanks.
and yes, i am always a missionary. :)
Well said, Becky!! I coudln't agree with you more... Your words make me want to call a few people right now just to tell them I'm thinking of them.
This year one of my goals for the year was to write a letter to someone special every week. So far I have been done it and honestly it has been life changing. It is such a great experiance to be able to tell people how much they mean to you, and often times you hear back.... it's been wonderful.
I'm excited for you and your new dedication to sharing your love with people, it will no doubt only be a WONDERFUL experiance.
p.s. You are great!! And definately have made my life better because you are/were in it!
The wonderful thing about your realization about your relationships with your family is that, you have made your discovery with plenty of time to improve on all of them. I feel sorry for those who lack the insight to fix things before it is to late. You have great reasons to rejoice!
Sorry for your discomfort with your kidney.
These are some of my very favorite posts, so thanks. It is good to have a chance to stop and really think about life and the relationships that we have.
As for the drugs I am so with you. I think those of us that obey the word of wisdom and it is not normal to have crazy stuff going through our bodies really makes you kind of loopy. I hope that you get feeling better.
I agree with you with everything you said. I love that you are my friend!
Kidney stones?! I had no idea? I loved your post!! Do it so more. I had to read it because this is exactly what I have been struggling with in my brain. Thanks for the thoughts.
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